What To Do If Your Rising Senior Is Reluctant to Start the College Application Process
Summer is right around the corner, and your junior seems oblivious about starting any type of work on a college application. I get it. I’ve had 2 of my 4 children who have done exactly this and have written about my own experience in my blog.
You’re probably pulling your hair out. All the “little nudges” just don’t seem to land. Either they are silent or say something to the effect of, “I know.” You become more and more frustrated and they become more and more avoidant.
The future problem is: pushing in October and December is exhausting. Taking essays to the very last minute is no fun for anyone. And it often leads to rushing edits with no time for rewrites. Getting started sooner is always best.
What do I suggest?
Setting one hour a week to just talk about college. You will have to stay silent for the remaining 167 hours, which will be no small feat. But your student gets assurance that they won’t have to worry about college more than they already do (they’re more worried than you think).
The benefits are:
Less stress for your student, especially with AP and final exams coming up.
You get to be organized. Record all your requests, questions, and feedback so the hour doesn’t turn into 2.
Get easy, yet important, tasks done during this time, such as:
creating a Common App Account,
discussing your college budget,
planning college visits, and
reviewing grades & test scores.
It may take a little bit longer at the start, but you’ll catch up. The first discussions may be overwhelming for all of you. Just keep the questions short & focused.
Avoid vague questions like:
Where do you want to go to college?
What majors do you like?
What do you want to write about in your essay?
Instead, frame them like this:
I’ve printed off some qualities of colleges, why don’t we see which ones are important for you?
Have you decided on a major? If the answer is no, continue asking about favorite classes, hobbies, or common college majors.
Let’s brainstorm some topics for your essay.
After final exams, your student may be open to more discussions. Keep a schedule though.
Nagging will get you nowhere.
Should you want to stop thinking about college incessantly, this is a great time to reach out to a consultant. Students may be more willing to talk to someone else, and you will know what to expect at each meeting.